In my dreams, I wake up and live another life. All the laws of nature apply. I go about my day, like any other day, ssdd. I'm never really asleep am I?

But in my dreams, I really feel alive.

can't help but want to be something more
trying to find the balance between me and my goals that will let me still grow and be happy...

I wish I could ask for you back, but look at me still struggling, how am I supposed to support when I'm still picking up the pieces.

still sitting here, staring into the broken mirror.  I see myself clearer than ever.

I thought I would never regret.  I told myself, I would just move on and not dwell on it because, well, that would be unproductive.   I stayed away and I can't hate myself enough.  You were someone strong, someone good at things I never could be good at.  Truth is, I admired you (to the point of envy).  I couldn't stand the thought of something this bad happening to you, wouldn't believe it.  [I would have gladly trade places]

I must have have been such an ass.  Sorry.

It's time to decide and I can't.
I know I just make things worse,
I'm so selfish for being here.